Trying Hard

"I'm trying."

How many times have you said that about your Christian walk?

"I'm doing my best."

I believe that this is many times my problem! It's "I" and "me"; not "He" and "Him."

Galatians 2:20 says, "...not I, but Christ liveth in me... and the life that I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God..."

It's not even my faith! It's His faith!

"That I may KNOW HIM, and the power..." Philippians 3:10

Are ye so foolish? having begun in the Spirit {at salvation}, are ye now {in sanctification/spiritual growth} made perfect by the flesh? Galatians 3:3


When we got saved, it was all HIM, so why do we think now we can mature spiritually in our own strength and "trying harder"?


Let us therefore fear, lest, a promise being left [us] of entering into his rest, any of you should seem to come short of it. Hebrews 4:1


There remaineth therefore a rest to the people of God. For he that is entered into his {God's} rest, he also hath ceased from his own works, as God [did] from his. Hebrews 4:9-10

One thinks, well, we have to try or else nothing is accomplished. Yes, it's true that I still have a choice to yield to the Spirit inside me when He tells me to pick up my Bible and read it. Yes, it's true that I still have things to accomplish in my day. In order to get them done, I do need to focus my mind and actually put one foot in front of the other--actually fill that cleaning pail up with soapy water.

It's not that "doing" goes away and we just lay around "enjoying God's presence" all the time! It's just that the "doing" is not ours to accomplish; our responsibility is just to yield and rest in His power, strength, faith, and love. I take my orders from Him, but--here's the key: He bears all the responsibility and burden!

My husband handles our finances, and I am happy that he does! Numbers are definitely not my forte! There is such a comfort and rest for me in this, because I trust my husband to bear the responsibility of the finances. He gives me a budget, and I follow it. Then I don't worry about the money. I have great freedom in this!

This is the way it is when I am in Christ. He bears all the burden and responsibility, and He takes care of me. All I have to do is listen to His voice telling me the very next step to take. His Holy Spirit lives inside me, and in Him, I have all the power I need to respond to that irritation in a godly way, to love that annoying person, to have patience with that toddler, to clean up for the millionth time after someone else!

Do I "get it"?

Today, as I peck away at my "to-do" list at home, I want to focus on "being"... "feeling at home in the presence of Jesus... laying way back in His love."

When I rest confident in His love and acceptance, I am so humbled by it, that I can extend grace to the next person.

I feel honoured to serve.

I feel compassion for the unseen hurts that cause another's insecurities, and I can show love to them in the face of their immature actions.

This is not an opportunity to put myself on a pedestal... when my attitude is right (remembering and being humbled that I am in Christ and His Spirit lives in me, I have no desire or reason to be proud!


Instead, I hide myself in the Secret Place of the Most High, and allow HIS life to flow through me. What a privilege!

Choosing Joy

Sara (pictured here with her dog Riley) is dying of a hereditary, autoimmune disease abbreviated AS, but as her blog proclaims, she is "choosing joy."

This is the most inspiring, convicting, and sobering thing I have read in awhile. She writes...

“How do you manage to stay so positive? So happy? Don’t you ever just get really mad?”

I suppose the cop out answer, while true, is that I just don’t have the energy to be mad. Seriously. It takes so much effort and energy to wallow. And it’s not any fun. I live 99.8% of my time alone, and if anger was all I had to live with I would lose my mind.

I think, for me, it has been about learning to want what He wants for me more than what I want for myself.It's a tall order and I don't say that flippantly. But my joy has truly come from Him finding His joy in me rather than me finding my joy in what I desire. It doesn't mean I don't long for different, it just means I find peace in fulfilling rather than understanding. In the knowledge that this life isn’t about me, it’s about Him.

The thing I try to remind myself of, as I am without all the things that I wish I had to make me happy, is that my biggest need is Him. More than I need to be outside in the fresh air, more than I need to move without pain, more than I even need Dad... I need His will to be done in my life whether it is comfortable or not. There is not one thing that feels comfortable about my world right now, but I need Him more than I need to change my circumstances.

It's still brutally hard. I have to remind myself of these facts every day. It doesn’t always come easily.

But it doesn’t make the truth any less true.

And the truth is that I can choose the joy.

So I do.

~ Sara at Gitzen Girl: Choose Joy blog, http://gitzengirl.blogspot.com/

Update: Tuesday, Sept. 14, 2011...

Sara received information late yesterday afternoon that her body was beginning to shut down, and things have moved quickly since. Hospice arrived this morning and Sara is comfortable. Her family is surrounding her and reading her texts, facebook posts, and emails, so please feel free to contact her and share your love; she will not be able to reply but is taking great peace in your words, your heart.  I know how thankful she is for each of you, how much joy you’ve added to her days, and what purpose sharing Him has given her. I will continue to post as things change and want to thank each of you for the ways in which you have loved sweet Sara so well.

Come Thou Fount

Keukenhof Gardens, Netherlands


Have you ever meditated awhile on the words of the hymn "Come Thou Fount" by Robert Robinson? Would you take a few moments just to read carefully and dwell on these thoughts?


1. Come, thou Fount of every blessing,

 Tune my heart to sing Thy grace; 

 Streams of mercy, never ceasing, 

 Call for songs of loudest praise. 

 Teach me some melodious sonnet, 

 Sung by flaming tongues above. 

 Praise the mount! I'm fixed upon it, 

 Mount of Thy redeeming love.

Jesus is the Fount that pours out every blessing in my life. When I realize that everything I have is a gift from Him--whether perceived good or bad*--my spirit (which is redeemed) wants my heart (my mind, will, and emotions, which are still carnal) to be tuned into that fact! Then I want to sing and tell everyone I know about His grace and never-ending streams of mercy!

*"Help me, Lord, when toil and trouble meeting, e'er to take as from a Father's hand."
(from the hymn "Day by Day.") 

 2. Here I raise mine Ebenezer*; 

 Hither by Thy help I'm come; 

 And I hope, by Thy good pleasure, 

 Safely to arrive at home. 

 Jesus sought me when a stranger, 

 Wandering from the fold of God; 

 He, to rescue me from danger, 

 Interposed His precious blood.

Oh to fully realize and continually remember that it's only by God's help that I have come to whatever place I've matured thus far in my life. And to acknowledge that it's only by His grace and pleasure (because He desires it) that He will safely conduct me home to Heaven. I'm so grateful that He searched for me when I was a sinner--born in sin--and that he "interposed" His precious blood on my behalf! 

 
*Ebenezer is a reference to I Samuel 7:12, meaning "hitherto hath the Lord helped." Other study helps indicate its meaning as "stone of help." It was a memorial stone erected by Samuel as a remembrance of the Lord's help in defeating the Philistines. 

3. O to grace how great a debtor 

 Daily I'm constrained to be! 

 Let thy goodness, like a fetter, 

 Bind my wandering heart to thee. 

 Prone to wander, Lord, I feel it, 

 Prone to leave the God I love; 

 Here's my heart, O take and seal it, 

 Seal it for thy courts above. 

I am such a debtor to His grace! Because I was saved as a young child and did not dabble much in the world, at times I have not understood everything from which Jesus saved me. Now daily I can recognize more and more from which He saved me! I can recognize my proud heart, my arrogance in thinking I've been spiritual, my quiet rage and inward bitterness others don't see. Yes, He saved me from so much! And it's His goodness that makes me want to more tightly bind my heart to His! He doesn't force me to live for Him. I want to, because I'm so grateful for His grace daily shown in my life, ever willing to deliver me from my pride and arrogance, my anger and bitterness. My flesh makes me prone to wander away, to sink back into these besetting sins, but my spirit wants Him to take my heart and keep it close to His--a daily choice to walk in the power of the Spirit of God that lives within me! What freedom! Freedom to choose Him, not the destructive way of living!

Renewing the Mind with Good Christian Books

It is so important to renew our minds with Scripture daily! Nothing can replace the Word!

But there is also a place for good Christian books that point us to Scripture. Often I am asked for a list of books that have helped me in my Christian walk, so I thought I would share that list here. I wish I had kept such a list years ago, because, naturally, I do not remember every book that has benefited me. Thus, this is a list to which I'm continually adding, as I remember them.

Note: I cannot give a blanket endorsement to these authors and books. As with anything, one must "eat the meat and throw out the bones."

Book/Author

A Song for All Seasons/ Wilma Sullivan

Abandoned to God (biography of Oswald Chambers)

Abide in Christ/ Andrew Murray

Be Transformed/ Scope Ministries *

Breaking Free Bible study/ Beth Moore*

Climbing/ Rosalind Goforth

Created to Be His Helpmeet/ Debi Pearl

Dorie: The Girl Nobody Loved/ Doris van Stone

Experiencing God daily devotional/ Henry Blackaby *

Hinds’ Feet on High Places/Hannah Hurnard

How I Know God Answers Prayer/ Rosalind Goforth

Humility/ Andrew Murray

Knowing God/ An Unknown Christian

Lifetime Guarantee/ Bill Gillham *

Living Free Bible study/ Beth Moore *

Love & Respect/ Emerson Eggerichs

My Utmost for His Highest/ Oswald Chambers

Reclaiming Surrendered Ground/ Jim Logan

Search for Significance/ Robert McGee *

So Long, Insecurity: You’ve Been a Bad Friend to Us/ Beth Moore *

Streams in the Desert/ Mrs. Charles E. Cowman

The Christian’s Secret of a Happy Life/Hannah Whitall Smith

The God of All Comfort/ Hannah Whitall Smith

The Hiding Place/ Corrie ten Boom

The Silent Years of Corrie ten Boom/ Pamela Rosewell *

Whispers of His Power/ Amy Carmichael

Missionary biographies, Holocaust stories

Keswick Convention talks

*Does not use the KJV

Writers

Andrew Murray
Corrie ten Boom
Darlene Deibler Rose
F.B. Meyer
Elisabeth Elliot
Rosalind Goforth
Ruth Paxson

Wearied and Faint in Your Minds

From my tea time with God...

I feel tired. Weary. 


I know who I am. In Christ I am strong. I have power. 


But my flesh is faint.


The words come to my mind: "wearied and faint..." What was the next part? "...in your minds."


My mind is part of my flesh, my body that has not yet been redeemed. It does not agree with my [redeemed] spirit unless I choose to align my it with the Truth that resides in my spirit. 


"...lest ye be wearied and faint in your minds."


What am I to do in order not to become weary and faint in my mind?


I go back to the beginning of the verse: "For consider HIM..." Jesus.


For consider him that endured such contradiction of sinners against himself, lest ye be wearied and faint in your minds. Hebrews 12:3


He was sinless, perfect. Never had He known pain or worry. Yet he choose to endure it for our sake--the sinners. 


Ye have not yet resisted unto blood, striving against sin. Hebrews 12:4


I sing a song in church at times, but I can hardly sing it without tears:


Compared to Calvary my cross is not so heavy,
Compared to Calvary my load's not hard to bear;
And it makes me ashamed that I ever complained,
I've had it easy, Lord, compared to Calvary!
Squire Parsons


His Word tells us to "consider Him" so that we don't REMAIN emotionally weary and faint. 


We live in this body of flesh; we WILL become weary and faint. That's a given. 


But what will we do when we get there? Wallow in it? Or consider Him?


Knowing Him more intimately is the greatest remedy for weariness there is!


Lord, I want to know You more,
Deep within my soul I want to know You;
O I want to know You!
To feel Your heart and know Your mind,
Looking in Your eyes stirs up within me,
Cries that say I want to know You!
O I want to know You more!
Steve Fry

His Ways Past Finding Out

O the depth of the riches both of the wisdom and knowledge of God! how unsearchable are his judgments, and his ways past finding out! ~ Romans 11:33


Here's what I read this morning by Oswald Chambers:

We have no conception of what God is aiming at, and as we go on it gets more and more vague. God's aim looks like missing the mark because we are too short sighted to see what He is aiming at. Naturally, our ambitions are our own; in the Christian life we have no aim of our own. There is so much said today about our decisions for Christ, our determination to be Christians, our decisions for this and that, but in the New Testament it is the aspect of God's compelling that is brought out. "Ye have not chosen Me, but I have chosen you." We are not taken up into conscious agreement with God's purpose, we are taken up into God's purpose without any consciousness at all.

God's purpose has been on my mind a lot lately. I have been praying for certain people in my life for what feels like quite some time. And it seems like God just isn't moving. You know what I mean? Nothing is happening. At least from my point of view. (I already know that God wants them to walk with Him, but they are choosing not to, and He has given them that free will.)

At times I start to feel, "What good are my prayers when they have a free will to do whatever they want anyway?" And on the other side, "If God is sovereign, then what good is it to pray earnestly for these people?"

Of course, Jesus taught us to pray and not to faint (Luke 18:1). Paul taught us to pray without ceasing (I Thessalonians 5:17). And "God is not unrighteous to forget [my] work and labour of love..." (Hebrews 6:10).

I have a long way to go in understanding the doctrines of predestination, foreknowledge, and sovereignty, but I do know that God wants me to pray. I don't know God's purpose. I don't always see where He is working in someone's life. And I don't always see what He is doing in my own life through learning patience in prayer! But I can be sure, He is good and up to something good! And He will work all  things together for good (Romans 8:28). Why? To conform me to the image of His Son Jesus (Romans 8:29)!

There was a rough period in my life when my mom would often start singing this song to encourage me:

Though you cannot see and you can't quite understand,

Remember God is still in control;

He has promised to bring you through somehow,

And He's working even now!

God is working, He's still working,

God is working even now;

Though we often don't know just how,

God is working, He's still working,

God is working even now.

Carol Cymbala, sung by Brooklyn Tabernacle Choir

Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego come to mind. In Daniel 3:17-18, they answered King Nebuchadnezzar, who had threatened to throw them into the fiery furnace:

"If it be so, our God whom we serve is able to deliver us from the burning fiery furnace, and he will deliver us out of thine hand, O king. BUT IF NOT..."

What if we took this attitude toward prayer?

I am asking for certain things, God, and I believe You are able and willing to ________. BUT IF NOT, (if You don't choose to allow it to happen the way I would like), I will still love, live for, walk with You, and trust in You, because You are sovereign and You are good.

Bread Alternative

I just tried this and it's good... albeit different. It's from my Yeast Connection Cookbook.

Yeast-free, Egg-free Buckwheat Cakes/Flatbread

1 C buckwheat flour

1 tsp sea salt (optional)

(I added a pinch of fructose... optional.)

1 to 1 1/2 C water (or more if needed to make batter thinner)

1 Tb oil

Make on griddle as pancakes on medium heat. (Don't forget to oil the griddle/fry pan.) These cook very quickly because they are very flat and thin. Flip each when bubble-holes form.

Use as bread for sandwiches for brown-bagging, or serve for breakfast with fresh fruit and yogurt on top... maybe even with maple syrup or honey!

Use wherever you would use bread.

I made an open-face sandwich snack with deli chicken (Naturals brand--no preservatives) and brown mustard on one buckwheat cake. Delicious!

P.S. I stored them between wax paper (saved from cereal boxes!) in a pita bread bag I already had. :)